The 2024 Paris Olympics affirmed the otherworldly talents of track and field's Noah Lyles and Gabby Thomas of the U.S., swimming's Leon Marchand of France and Katie Ledecky of the U.S., pole vault's Armand "Mondo" Duplantis of Sweden, and Greco-Roman wrestler Mijaín López of Cuba, and of course men's basketball's Avengers of Team USA.
Lyles won what a lot of pundits say was the greatest century dash race in history, as he finished literally a whisker ahead of runner-up Jamaica's Kishane Thompson in 9.79 with all eight finalists actually crossing the finish line 0.12 seconds of each other.
Thomas, meanwhile, topped the women's 200m run with a time of 21.83. She also proved that life indeed is unfair as she not only has superhuman speed and supermodel looks, but also graduated from Harvard and holds a master's degree in epidemiology.
Marchand also made history on home soil after he became just the fourth swimmer in Olympic history to have won four individual gold medals at a single Games—200m medley, 200m breaststroke, 200m butterfly, and 400m medley.
Ledecky won her ninth gold overall medal after touching the tile first in the women's 800m and 1,500m freestyle. The two gold medals—plus silver and bronze in the 4x200m freestyle relay and women's 400m freestyle, respectively—gave her 14th overall in the Olympics, making Ledecky the most decorated U.S. female Olympic swimmer in history.
Duplantis, who competes in the same sport as Filipino pole vaulter EJ Obiena, etched his name anew in the Olympic record books by 6.25m in the summer sports spectacle. At various points in his splendid career, the 24-year-old has now cleared the nine of the sport's highest heights of all time.
Team USA's Avengers, meanwhile, won its fifth straight Olympics gold medal after "Chef" Stephen Curry gave a shooting display for the ages in the last two minutes of the finale against host France and Victor Wembanyama. It's a testament on how the world has truly caught up with America's hoops dominance since the U.S. started sending NBA players to the Olympics in 1992 in Barcelona, as it took the combined greatness of Curry, LeBron James, and Kevin Durant to bring home the bacon for Team USA.
Last but definitely not the least, Lopez retired unbeaten after collecting his fifth Olympic gold medal in the Olympics. Cuba's flagbearer in the 2024 Paris Olympics hasn't tasted defeat since debuting in the Beijing 2008 Olympics in the 120-kg/130-kg heavyweight division.
Outside of the superlative performances, the quadrennial event also mined gold medal-worthy memes from competitive shooting's Yusuf Dike of Turkey, breakdance's Rachael Gunn of Australia, and pole vault's Anthony Ammirati of France.
Shooting's Yusuf Dike of Turkey won a silver medal in the 10m air pistol mixed team event with compatriot Sevval Ilayda Tarhan. "Daddy Cool" Dike shot into viral fame though by making his rounds with nothing but garden variety glasses and an earphone along with one hand in his pocket.
Gunn has been the talk of the town since her infamous "zero" breakdance routine in the 2024 Paris Olympics. It was so bad that it made you question how did the college lecturer with a PhD in Cultural Studies qualified for the Games (makes me want to see the routines of other b-girls from Oceania). The kangaroo was unique but running sideways on the floor like Curly of The Three Stoogies just added to the general Elaine Benes vibe of Gunn's weird performance.
If it turns out that her comedic breakdance routine was intentional to put a spotlight on the sport debuting in the Paris Olympics, then bravo for the 36-year-old as she definitely accomplished her intended goal.
Then there's Ammirati, who surely made a name for himself at his Olympic debut in the City of Lights when the 21-year-old Frenchman's manhood impeded him from clearing the designated height on his pole vault attempt.
My pastor would probably disown me for writing this, but that unintended stunt apparently has resulted in a $250,000 offer from the adult industry and that's after Ammirati finished 12th in the preliminaries of the pole vault competition after a combine score of 5.6 points.
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