FIVE, four, three, two, one.

Joseph Villanueva bursted from the starting line of the 2024 National Milo Marathon Manila Leg at the Mall of Asia (MOA) Concert Grounds.

Like the other races he's joined, the 29-year-old felt ecstatic at the start of the 3 a.m., 21K race.

As he continued to pick up speed, "Seph" found his face getting moisturized not with sweat, but with teardrops dripping from his eyes.

"Why am I doing this? Why did I join this?"

These were the questions, Seph recalled, that popped up in his mind on that Sunday of April 28.

Those questions used to have a simple answer: he just wants to have an active and healthy lifestyle.

But for this Milo race, the reason was a lot deeper.

It's for his late parents, especially his father Pablo, who passed away a month earlier due to kidney failure and complications.

"The determination I had [at] that time was much stronger. At the start, the energy was amazing, but I asked myself, 'why was I doing this'? Why did I join this?' I was really crying," Seph shared with The Manila Times.

"I used to start slow, just find the pace that I want but if I could go faster near the finish line, I would. But for this one, I don't have a specific structure. It was just going all out from start to finish."

A month before, the "ticking bomb" as Seph described it, exploded on their family — his father's death. They knew it was coming because Pablo, in an effort to lighten the burden for his family, chose to no longer undergo dialysis. He said some of his friends went through it but did not survive anyway. What's the point?

"I was in the middle of my training at that time, three weeks before a half-marathon race but then we lost him. For a week, I had no training and workout," said Seph, who also lost his mother Rosenda (septic shock) two years earlier.

He knew he had to channel his grief into something, into running. From this point on, Seph, who works in the Media Buying industry, dedicates his races to his parents.

"This Milo Marathon has grown to have more meaning for me. I told myself if I could not make the cutoff (2.5 hours for 21k race), it's like I'm failing them. I'm just doing it for them. It fuels me to get faster, and I've come to a point that running would be my outlet for everything."

The sun was yet to shine, but it was already humid. Seph did not care. His motivation is far stronger than the heat. He pressed on, running with all his might. At this point, it's no longer his training that keeps him going. It's that burning desire to honor his parents.

Sustaining high speed was not something he has done in his previous races and so it made him weep that this time, he can. His willpower is unmatched. Running and crying his way from the starting line to the U-turn in Luneta, to the Cultural Center of the Philippines, all the way to the finish line, Seph logged a personal record of two hours and 12 minutes, beating his previous best by 21 minutes.

Seph made it back to the MOA Concert Grounds at 5:12 a.m., 23 minutes before sunrise.

"This was the first event that I joined where it's really hot," shared Seph, who participated in 10 running events prior to this Milo Manila leg as he started joining races in March last year.

"It was very challenging, but I have a deeper reason why I'm doing this. My goal is to make it to the cutoff because if I make it, I'll make my parents proud. I know they're not around but if it weren't for them guiding me, I couldn't do it.

"They never saw me train, we just talked about my races at times. When I finished in just two hours and 12 minutes, I realized that this is not because of my training anymore. They might not be around, but I know they're guiding me, and that's why I managed to go faster."

Usually, Seph would complain why he did he join the running event he just participated in. Why the hell did he exhaust himself? This time, there was no complaining. He finds a sense of fulfillment, instead. It's for his mom and dad, after all.

"This is the kind of race where you don't complain. I had races before where I was like 'why the hell did I do this? What have I gotten myself into?' Here, you'll just stop for a bit and then you continue again. I felt comfortable in this race for some reason. I'm more confident in a way. It's a lot more fulfilling."